Whoa.

My last entry was when I was still a LCP. hah.

I'm a Corporal liao. And going to ORD in 1 month and 2 days. My understudy has already come but unfortunately after 6 days with us, he's now going for a course. He'll be back to see me leave though.

A pretty smart kid with a GPA of 3.8 for a Diploma in IT Security or something.

A lot's changed since then but I can't say much because now that I've grown older, there are some things that I have to be discreet about. Sure, I'll still say things that the more conservative might consider should be kept to oneself, but who gives a fuck. Yea, phrases like that included.

Had my first real drift yesterday in the van. The Impreza does not count as it's front wheel drive (or 4 wheel drive - so they claim). A taxi had come to a dead stop after the lorry on his right mistook the merge signs on the road to mean he was to merge with the taxi. Swerved to the right after finding the front brake to be unresponsive. Quickly countered to the left and found myself drifting for a short distance. Sure, maybe it was just a baby drift but chances are if you even have a license, you're driving a front wheel drive car so bite me.

Today, I left home at exactly 3.42pm. Headed out to the Shell station for the crazy 44cent discount going on from 4 to 5. Reached there at 4pm to the minute but there was a queue. By the time I reached the station, I was the last one to get the discount, at exactly 5pm. Well, officially at least.

I filled the van so full that petrol actually started leaking out of the tank. We'll see how this goes. 7Km/L on Shell's 95.

Last week of recourse

I could've sworn there were many fun things that happened but I forgot them all.

All I remember was CO Sch 1 coming up to our bunks, me giving out mineral water to the confinees, and me meeting up with Syed and his gang at Dbl 0 which I believe was a fun night.

Hmm....

T-minus 1 week

This was the second last week of my recourse BMT and it went by pretty fast.

Took status on Tuesday after killing my feet during the 12km Route March by wearing new boots. The old ones were still wet and so were drying at home. Then, to counteract the blistering, I began to walk bow-legged which cramped my left thigh muscle and made my right knee hurt to high heaven.

I still took part in SOC though and was quite proud that I was able to complete every single obstacle. Skipped the IPPT though.

Went for a Dental Appt on Thursday but forgot to bring some stuff so the flirty dentist sent me back home early and I ended up slacking with Syed at Eastpoint, looking at the people and chatting the time away.

Friday had another 16click route march scheduled in the evening but I was still on status so I did not participate. Consequently, I was confined till the next morning whereas everyone who participated got to book out that night. But the confinees made the best of it by playing a spot of soccer and chatting the time away. Talked a lot with Samuel about life in general, friends and religion. Went to sleep past midnight and woke up at 5, dead tired.

Those who marched (and had gone back) were dead tired themselves anyway, completing 16 clicks in exactly 3.5 hours, inclusive of rest times. Crazy shit.

As usual, the confinees ran out of smokes and everyone turned to their regular "backups" to find spare smokes. I was Samuel's, Kok Xiong's and Poobalan's backup. Damn irritating.

Anyways, drove up to Malaysia the next evening with Ali, Md Nur and his gf where we makan-ed and lepaked, enjoying the Malaysian cigarettes. After sending Md Nur and his gf home, me and Syed headed over to ECP to slack with Syed's friend, Fadhil, where I got friggin wasted with the equivalent of a little over 6 shots of vodka in half an hour. I attributed this to the fact that I had not drunk ANY water since yesterday afternoon.

Outfield

So we had our field camp this week.

In terms of training and discipline, it was alright except for the stand-to exercises which were stupid, especially the one that we had to do for half an hour after changing into new uniforms. Smoke breaks were about the same as in camp, which it to say it was at any break or rest time, which was a lot. haha

In terms of the environment however, it was the worst I've ever seen or experienced in my life.

Day 1:
Had our 8 click route march where it began to rain very very heavily. We're talking about if I were driving, I-would-seriously-consider-slowing-my-car-down-for-safety kind of rain. How it rains on the main land, in the Tekong camp, and in the Tekong forests are all very different despite them being the same rain clouds. Within 10 minutes of the rain starting, my boots were flooded past my ankles and my field pack had gained an extra kg of water. I kid you not, it was a Cat 1 rain.

The field camp site was somewhat flooded and as we began to dig our drains and set up our bashas, we inadvertently brought up any remaining ground water to the surface. Light showers during this period. This is all I remember from day 1.

I slept less than 2 hours that night.

Day 2:
Light rain during reveille. Boots and socks were flooded to just below the ankles, despite my draining them and keeping them under shelter. Everyone was covered with erupting sores and mosquito bites. Did some lectures and some training and boots filled up to previous levels of water.

We were allowed to go back to shower within 1 hour. Everyone boarded the tonner with dry pairs of underwears and uniforms but the same wet boots.

It rained that night. Slept under an hour.

Day 3:
It rained at reveille. We proned in the mud in our stand to position for about 15 minutes. Went for our first lecture and training regime. A few minutes after it was finished, it began to rain very very heavily as the Cat 1 alarm sounded off. Everyone was confined to their rapidly flooding Bashas. Hansel and me began to sing loudly and enjoyed ourselves before Amos and Md Nur started joining in for a few of the songs, much to the chagrin of Bo who was actually able to doze off a few times.

Dinner was consumed and by 7pm it had started to rain even more badly than the first day. Even the admin tentage was flooding. Within half an hour, Hansel and Driver and Medic were running to the admin tentage complaining of swimming pool conditions. Poobs and Feisal did the same but all were shooed away within ten minutes of arriving at the shelter.

Under special medical conditions, I was able to sleep in the land rover that night (supposed to be under tentage but there was no space). I managed about 3 hours.

Day 4:
It rained about as badly as Day 1 in the morning so much so that the morning exercises were canceled. At about 8 we headed to an adjacent lot to dig our shell scrapes. I sneaked a can of red bull in to my system and found that it helped none whatsoever.

As expected, we were let off that afternoon.

Day 5:
We cleaned stores. It rained. We cleaned stores. Cougar recruits washed their mud from their stores onto our stores. Fuck.


Field camp was over by day 6 and everyone was ecstatic about going home and technically "passing the course".

Our transport bus was driven by a former 3rd sergeant who was adamant on us 'not breaking the windows in his bus'.

Then Shakir, Syed and me(Shawn) shared a cab back to Simei that was driven by a crazy lady. She was like touching her hair and rubbing her face then touching the steering wheel every few seconds. She really looked maniacal.

A number of us were supposed to head down to Dbl 0 to celebrate our field camp success including Sgt Jonathan but many of them decided to fly their kites, including Sgt Jonathan. Hansel, Bo and Sam were absent as well. Syafiq lost his phone during the cab ride with Bernard so gave it a miss also, despite my obtaining his house number and calling him up.

I had a quick shower at home before rushing off to Dbl 0 and actually arrived 5 minutes before Ali did. Considering that he left before me and he's an insane driver I find it very commendable.

Met up with Syed's gang (who are all fun as fcuk) and we hit the bar almost immediately. In about 30 minutes, I was filled with about 5 shots of Tequila and 2 or 3 Jaeger bombs.

Jacky and his GF arrived somewhere in the middle of that and they ended up drinking my alcohol. Fadhil noticed that and sponsored a round for everyone to raise my BAC to illegal levels.

Some chicks started moving in on me, mostly because I was dancing like a man man. I was moving my feet like a man on speed but I moved away after a bit because, to be honest, I don't really give a rat's ass about having to play it cool anymore. I just want to do what I want to do. I don't really care about my image. It's just too troublesome. I guess I'm old.

I couldn't stand it though, when Ali started dancing on the top with his ancient but well executed moves and I burst out laughing every few minutes, setting Ahmad into laughter as well.

Once Joel arrived, we headed down to O bar, to support Jacky and his RnB habit. The place was seriously packed. It was no fun for me as I had to stop every few seconds to give someone room to walk past.

I headed out when it began to get too hot and me and Joel decided to go back upstairs. The re-rentry queue was damn long but it was entertaining because Syed had snagged himself some crazily drunk chicks. They were seriously past it.

Left at about 2.45 to find a summons on my car. I felt seriously fucked because all the indications were there. Like when I was arriving, there were riot police vehicles and patrol guys all around. I should have parked higher up the slope.

Played with Ali all the way to Simpang until Joel was convinced that Ali's car had a Ferrari engine inside. Ended up eating 2 Roti John's because I got it confused with Roti Prata.

Sent Jacky and his now ex gf home at about 5. In my haste to go to sleep, I left a burnt cigarette on the car seat which my dad found the next day.

Woohoo. Book in time.

Ignite & Kenneth's Birthday

This week was eventful as usual and I also ended up finding 2 former BMT mates in my section commanders. Then there was Samuel who was so sleepy that he actually fell asleep kneeling with his head on the bed and his arms dangling beside him... in the middle of the day.

So at night I went for Ignite's Birthday celebrations. Was a pretty mild affair. Met one of the priests who apparently goes fishing and used to be from an armour unit during his NS years. Talked a little and tried to make the best of the situation (Eugene could not make it at the last minute). Chatted a fair bit with Ian again over some fags. Nice guy.

Headed over to Dbl 0 at roughly 9.15 and found myself speeding to make time. I also found myself out of cigarettes by the time I had found a parking lot.

Met up with Wei Zhen and Song Wee in the queue before heading upstairs to find Mich, Sophie and Kenneth, the birthday boy.

Mich and me

Sophia and me

Mich, Sophia & Kenneth

Ended up reuniting with an old BMT mate, Kong Ee who also turned out to be the fren of a fren of the fren of a female fren of the birthday boy.

Kong Ee and me

The man's a playa! And a retro fanatic! Think I'll be bumping into him a good number of times in the near future as he's also a regular at Dbl 0.

Showed me a few of his magic tricks and was impressed enough to try and learn them. Nothing like Houdini but enough to garner interest in the viewer, with the intended viewer being a member of the opposite sex. heh.

Chris popped up out of nowhere at around midnight and started dancing almost immediately. For the most part I lazed around the couch, chatting with Kong Ee and his OCS friend. Mich was out dancing with Alex, yet another lover of hers. Song Wee was semi passed out on the couch (a situation he would find himself in many times that night). Kenneth had puked in front of the sofa (ala me on my birthday) and his meaty but pretty target was mostly seated around the table because apparently she didn't dance.

Went to dance with Kong Ee and co for a bit sometime after Chris arrived but found myself woefully inadequate when comparing my moves to those veterans so went out for a smoke before heading back to the couch. Came back to find Mich on the couch with none of her lovers with her. After a while of sitting on a backless stool, I moved over to Mich and proceeded to make out with her passionately for a good hour before we decided to make a move to my car for a quickie. Oh wait, that was just in my head. haha. What really happened was I went to sit next to her, she leaned on me, I put my arms around her and we both started killing time by staring at anything that moved. I was too tired to dance and she was too self-conscious to dance.

One by one, her different lovers (all which she had 'personally' and 'individually' invited by the way) began to filter back to the table, presumably from the dance floor. I chuckled to myself each time one of them came back with a slight frown on their faces as they noticed Mich and me slacking together, and I realised that none of them really knew who they were chasing after.

Song Wee and Chris (who had now become his minder) began to frequently repeat the cycle of hitting the dancefloor and coming back to the table as Song Wee began to lose it each time. That was till they started playing all my favourite "rock" hits. Once that happened, I literally pulled them to the dancefloor and began to dance like the "rocker" I am. Kenneth's colleague was there also though we both left the floor once Song Wee and Chris started chasing after skirts again. Young, hormonal kids.

It was short lived but it was fun.

By now, Kenneth had puked a second time near the exit sign and the place was beginning to smell like the 0 Bar.

Wanted to leave at around 1.30 as I was growing increasingly tired. But ended up staying till about 2.30 as Chris was adamant about chasing after this particular skirt that was really into him except for the fact that some of Kenneth's friends were constantly chasing her off.

Hit the dancefloor somewhere around 2 with Michelle as the company at the table was growing incredibly boring. Began laughing while we were dancing to which I was prompty slapped by Michelle. Apologised and started laughing again not more than a minute after that. She didn't know what I was laughing about but I knew she assumed it was her so she stormed off the dancefloor, to the table and dragged Kenneth's target back to the floor while I retook my seat back at the table.

For people who don't really know her, Mich is crazy and incredibly insecure. Save for her self-conscious nature and near non-existant Christian values (at least that's what I figure), she could have been characterised by a single common 4 letter word.

Despite this being Singapore, a small country, I've randomly met enough acquaintances of hers to be convinced that she has some serious issues, if you know what I mean. Both Chris and me do care for her somewhat like family but recently, we've both realised that there really is nothing much we can do, save for kidnapping her and slapping some sense into her with an MG242. The problem with her is that she's probably done too many bad things to bother listening to people for advice. She's pretty stubborn yet weak willed at the same time.

Anyway, Chris eventually came back to the table, having given up on the girl he was chasing after and we left for home. As I've always noticed recently, he, like all my passengers were all pretty nervous regarding my sobriety despite me being totally legal at that point in time.

It was raining pretty bad by the time we hit the highway and the white lines were all but invisible. It was like driving down a Need For Speed: Underground 2 road with the 'reflection detail' at maximum. The road was mirror like. Nevertheless, I travelled at fast but legal speeds on the empty roads.

We were driving down the PIE somewhere behind Bedok Reservoir Road when I hit a puddle going at 90. It slowed me down to about 20 almost instantly despite my foot still being on the gas. The car started to lift of the road and I had to turn the wheel almost 90 degrees in both directions just to keep it straight.

Before I could even recover the car, I hit another puddle which almost stopped me dead before I filtered to the left most lane and engaged the car's "Hold mode". There were 2 taxis on either end of me. One was 10 metres in front and another was 20 metres back. Both of them were caught in the same situation as me. The guy in front of me was so rattled that he began to drive with his hazard lights on.

Finally reached Chris' house and we had a short but interesting talk under his void deck as I puffed away. Talked mostly about that night and some about Mich. Made our conclusions and agreed that she was pretty much a non-issue in our lives anymore. Said our goodbyes and I left.

I was exiting his carpark and about to make a right turn to the road when all of a sudden I swerved left as I noticed I was too close to the centre divider but it was too late. The car flew over the curb violently at about 30 kph. I composed myself quickly and pulled over to the nearest bus stop to check for damage. There were scratches all over the underside of the car but under than that, everything else seemed fine.

The curb was totally invisible and I only pulled away at the last minute only from noticing the dark green fence being too close to me. In spite of the rain, I rolled down the window and slowly puffed my way back home.

As with every weekend out, it was very eventful. I wouldn't say the music was good, hell they were playing backstreet boys' songs. But it was definitely a fun night though somewhat unnerving what with all the dangers I experienced that night.

21 + 14

Did a lot of stupid things again in camp.

Had a challenge with Bo (Clive) on the chin up bars. First it was who could do more chin ups. Then it was who could hang on the longest with one hand. Then it progressed to trying to kick each other off the bars before becoming chin up bar humping, with him being the bitch. haha.

Before long we trying to see who could swing to the other's bar first, who could take off their shoes with only their feet first and who could take off their shoes and socks first. I won the shoe thing hands down but Bo won the shoes and socks thing without breaking a sweat. From the way he spoke about his past, I'm not surprised. ;-)

Then there was the thursday where I was sleepy as fcuk for some reason and began laughing at random intervals for no particular reason. It could just be a simple conversation and I would start laughing at simple things like how the words were pronounced or how the guy was sitting when he spoke. At one point, I ran out from the smoking point to the compound and shouted for everyone to keep still there. Of course, as luck would have it, there was no one there. But it felt good. haha

Made some pretty good friends there. Everyone is a laojiao (experienced [soldier]) to some degree.

There's Hansel who's a crazy bastard who is as funny as he is insane.

Then there's Bo who's from Burma and Syed who's unphased by anything, speaks freely and always wakes up late.

There's Talos who's a bit weird with his Wicca practices but quite smart in my opinion and gives great massages. He used to steal my food after certain meals but I put a stop to it once I had him figured out. Thank God He protects me.

There's also Samuel who's a semi-worldly Christian who's quite placid in that he's trying to figure everyone and everything out.

'Medic's a blur and miserly but funny-in-his-own-way kind of guy. 'Driver' (Desmond) is another blur one but still relatively street savvy.

Then there's Jacky who's quite honestly one of the nicest and open guys I've known. You can't tell if you are friends with him but if you take a step back and analyse him, you'll see it.

There's Bernard, the Yankee storeman who with me, will most of the time walk around in our underwears.

Santos is a Filipina who considers me Malay because I can't speak Chinese. Then there's Joel with a really colourful history but he's a good guy, but still has some of his past on his shoulders.

And that's just my section, who all happen to be smokers by the way. All in all, we're all mostly quite close to one another with the exception of a few bad apples. 'Orchard Road' is an ass who is a blatant follower and compulsive liar. Most of us have given up on him. And of course there's Thiban who's probably going to be charged soon.

There are really too many friends to fit into this post though. And oh yea, Richard and Ryan are Catholics too. Both are relatively insane, just like me. Then there's Amos who's thinking of converting to Christianity. Whether Catholicism or Protestanism is still on the debate table for him.

We all go through the same shit together. Like almost all of us had scratches all over our body due to the stupid Battle Innoculation Course. The course was damn short but the soil was damn soft so leopard crawling was very tough. Amos who was behind me was cheering me on sporadically but my arms had never felt such pain before and my legs, well I couldn't really feel them.

Then there was the live grenade throw where there were 2 nades that didn't explode, both belonging to persons from section 4, a section notorious for having a very bad discipline record. We planned to celebrate their 'birthdays' but alas we were short on time with the training schedule so tight this week.

Had a great debate with Talos on a few subjects which I now forget and an exchange of opinions on the topic of homosexuality and evolution and Darwin's theory of evolution. I came out with my points at first but as it was just an exchange, I prodded him for his own points. Found that it was not quite as straight forward as it usually was with him and I found myself arguing for the legalisation of homosexual marriages and etc for a while. I finished the remaining sticks in my half full pack of smokes while talking to him. Sometimes though, he takes his debates too personally for me to enjoy learning from each other. I don't always want a winner in a debate between friends, i much prefer the sharing of opinions. Bbut for the most part, we both share some very unique opinions and positions.

Took 6 sticks from Murali after he bought a new pack from my friend from the office because his gang and him finished up a significant portion of my last pack because none of them had the sense to buy more packs, despite this being the 6th week of training.

Ended up going to dbl 0 that night with Syed, him driving his car and me driving my own. His people are crazy bastards who had the skill and energy to make that night one of the most fun nights of my life.

Happened to meet Ben and Sophie there and the latter introduced me to Maple. Quite a cute girl but she was very young and looked pretty naive in terms of relationships. She was clinging on to her ex (who's name I forget) as if they were still together.

Syed is damn power with his pickup skills, from my observations with him and Maple. I was wowed by the stunts he pulled but he refrained from doing too much mainly because by extension, Maple was my friend. I swear I gotta learn from him.

I tell you, the longer you serve in NS, the more fun (but tiring and routine) it gets because everyone stops giving a shit to a certain point and we start filling our time with other more entertaining pursuits.

21 + 7

I had planned to book out on friday but that was cancelled due to RT - 6km route march. So basically my halloween plans were ruined. Not that I had any concrete plans but I planned to go out la. I mean, cmon. We're all lao jiaos to some degree. 6km is nothing but a waste of time for us. Some of us have been on 62 route marches (or 64 or 68, I forget) before.

The crazy ones among us decided to compensate for this change of fortunes with a camo-on parade but it was shelved after everyone got tired and just fell asleep... at like 10.30pm.

I wolfed down 2 durian flavoured potong ice creams before I turned in and finished my last pack of smokes.

Woke up the next day and dude the standard routine stuff and finally headed out for the damn march. I volunteered myself to be the rear scout but alas there was no smoking or fooling around because the safety vehicle was trailing us all the way.

Ended up booking out at 11ish. Headed to the nearest mac and bought a McSpicy meal and took the bus home.

Took a nice drag on my newly bought smokes at the stairwell of my block before I began to realise that my pockets felt lighter than usual. Did a quick change and found my house keys were missing. Did a quick call to the Ops room to get the number of my coy and asked the COS to keep my keys for me, which were left on my locker.

It was a good thing my bro was home so he opened up the door. Finished up my unwatched tv episodes on the ipod while laying in my comfy bed while eating the damn McSpicy.

It took only about half an hour before I began to feel sharp pains in my gut. So as usual, I took a sip of my McMilo, which expectedly, only made the fucking thing worse. It was beginning to feel like my insides were coated with napalm.

Tahaned the pain all the way as I brought my family to eat at Pagi Sore (which I incorrectly pronounced as 'sore' in the pain sense. It's pronounced `saw-ray`). We didn't end up eating there though because my sister was not fond of spicy foods. So we ended up eating at the unmaintained hawker centre where Oyaku Don meals were only $2.80. Halfway through the meal I began to feel my large intestine began to disintegrate so I rushed off to the disgusting toilet.

Through to it's outward appearance and location, the toilet was filthy and the only squatting-toilet-bowl-equipped cubicle was at the corner which was only slightly bigger than the width of my shoulders. This did not include the fact that there was a fucking pillar at the entrance of the cubicle and that whole thing narrowed towards the back of the stall.

About 2 minutes into the all out assault on the bowl, I decided that killing my lungs with the smell was just not worth it. So I took out a pack of smokes and puffed away. Finally called a cease-fire just under 10 minutes into the exercise, decided the stench was still in my nose hairs and headed out to the nearest parking lot to clear my lungs of the stench. So I lit another cigarette.

Directed my dad on how to get to the place where I was gonna collect my co2 canister before deciding that it was too much for me to bear but I remembered the training that they thought me in the SAF and somehow managed to hold it all in.

Finally reached home and using the SAF method of holding in my waste materials, I managed to set up my co2 canister for my tank before finally going for another offensive operation on the toilet bowl.

Drove out to meet shahryl for a drink but decided that I still needed to make another bombing run so went up to his office and decimated his bowl. The best part was that it could not flush a second time. So there were still remnants of my activities floating around.

Headed over to a nearby coffeeshop as we drank about a quarter of the night away, talking about old times and catching up. Went back home at about 3ish-4 (if I rmb correctly) and woke up unprepared to book in.

Luckily, my dad was willing to send me because his badminton game was cancelled so I reached there just as they were about to board the bus.

So that's how my weekened went, a week after my 21st. Not too interesting but not too dull.

21st Birthday.

Friday started off like every other day for the past 3 weeks. Woke up at 5.30, exercised at 5.45, ate breakfast at 6 and smoked till 7.

Santos bailed from yet another duty so just wanting to make the time pass faster, I took up his slack. Had a good smoke at Rocky Hill where we set up camp. Chatted with Jan about life and before we knew it, our CSM was barelling down the road, in the wrong gear nonetheless, and bitching about the location of the water point.

Being the laojiao that I am, the next 8 hours passed by very quickly.

Had a good birthday bash from the guys after dinner (where they throw all sorts of rubbish at you from camo cream to milo powder to ribena). Some ass threw fucking detergent down my pants, provided by the not-my-fren-anymore 'firhan'. Ass. Chased a few of them down the corridor before rubbing my filthy arms over Section 3's windows. haha.

It took me a good half hour to wash off everything and a few more hours for the minty sensation on my member to subside.

Fell in at about 7ish for book out. Reached in my field pack to switch my spectacles and ended up slicing my left pinky on the uncovered Gillette Fusion razor blade I had put inside. Bled quite a fair bit from that. My pinky's still somewhat swollen by the way.

It was beginning to look like my birthday in 2006 so I had a good smoke on the ferry to calm my nerves.

Went home with Syed, bought him a Mocha Frap and smoked and talked about life in general. Reached home at about 9 and texted Mich to tell her I was too knackered to meet up with her. Went to sleep at 9.30 and woke up at around 9am the next day, hugging my bolster nonetheless. Worked on Azul from then on till about 5ish. Got rdy to go out and well, headed out. Minus smokes.

I've always been one who hates celebrating my birthday. 21st or not. I hate being in the spotlight when I don't want to be in it. That being said, I do occasionally enjoy stealing the spotlight. haha. I just don't like people to be scrutinising me in my ordinary disposition.

Dad bought me a limited edition F2002 model set. Number 2510(25th Oct) out of 5555. It was unsigned unfortunately because despite his meeting both Massa and Kimi, they were not allowed to sign stuff.

Ate a $60 buffet at Royal Park @ Scotts with the family but didn't stuff myself because for some reason, I was already stuffed.

Left at about 8 to meet hansel to get inked. Well actually, to get sprayed. Airbrushed to be exact. I had always wanted to see what the alternatives looked like. It looked nice but was nothing like the real thing.

The entire process was over pretty fast and I found myself texting my dad to see if he was still in the area to give me a lift, which he was. Dropped me off at Double 0 - which my dad swore was near the old Madam Wong's which made me wonder what he was like when he was younger.

Met Jeremy, his bro and his gay partner (so he says) almost as soon as I had stepped out of the car. Chatted for a bit then quickly queued up behind the fast growing line. Then James popped out of nowhere and we queued together. Yea. Fun stuff. lol

Did the usual entry-exit at O-Bar and had a quick smoke which is when Mich and Sophie popped out of nowhere and joined in the Global Warming contest.

Queued up again after that and in keeping with the theme that evening, Kyle too popped out of nowhere. I swear, I must have been fucking blur at that point in time because I seriously did not see any of them coming.

Hana S., Khairiyah and Sophia

Went up to the table and got bored pretty fast. Asked Mich to make out with me but was brushed aside. Asked Sophie to make out with me and was laughed off. Asked Kyle to make out with me and he moved in close before he saw my tongue and quickly moved back. haha.

Mich (behind my elbow), Kenneth (behind my big biceps) and me

Anyways, the rest started showing up soon after. Saw (2lt) Alvin at the place and he bought me a jug of something. Nice guy. Started doing shots with Khai, Wan and intermittently with some of the other guys.

Went for a smoke after about the 7th shot with Wan and Khai. Laughed our asses off at Wan who was laughing uncontrollably for some reason. Came back and was forced to take about another 3 or 4 shots. That was when I felt like eating steak. Mostly because the now semi regurgitated steak was tantalising my taste buds. mmm. Steak. Thought about it a little more, turned to the right and boom. I exploded. Having a slight flu and a chest infection and doing shit like this was probably not a good thing.

Me and (CPL) James

It was at about the second wave of shots that I began to feel high. Personally, my best so far was 11 shots in about an hour and a half while still feeling relatively in control. With the exception of feeling the need to run and laughing very easily, I didn't feel like puking. Oddly enough, that time it was on an empty stomach.

Wan, Khairul and me

Apparently, being sick seriously screws my ability to control myself. Went for another smoke and sat down on the couch and began to stone.

Ben and Ash popped by somewhere around 12. Champagne was opened and I took a sip before handing it to Ben cuz I was seriously not feeling it. Ben then disappeared somewhere around 12:01. The ass.

Joline J (Facebook acquaintance and Khairiyah's member)

Went to the floor with Ash and Ken for a bit where I was jumping like mad for some reason. True to the rocker's jump, I lost my shades which were in my pocket. Went back to the couch when I felt my lips cracking up.

Stoned for a bit more and took some photos with the guys, taken by some Ang Mo girl from the next table WHO STILL HAS NOT SENT ME THE PHOTOS. The bitch. lol

Laughed at Kyle who was lying down on the chair in a fashion similar to a person who had been dead for a significant period of time.

About half an hour later, Mich stumbled to the couch and dragged me out to the floor again. Happened to be at the spot where Khairiyah, Siddig and Joline were dancing. I don't really remember much on that. Mainly that me and mich were sort of dancing up the wall and after something I said, she gave me a quick peck on the lips. I cannot recall what I said.

Seeing the other 3 girls were dancing by themselves, Mich asked me to dance with them which I did as she went off to dance with her lover for the night. Danced with Joline for a bit but she was frigid, or possibly turned off by the fact that I could still have had bile on me (which I didn't). So moved to Siddig who faced me but quickly pointed out that she doesn't like to grind guys. So, ok. Danced for like a few minutes before getting bored and went back for a smoke before heading back to the table.

By now, Wan was puking in a jug and staring at the contents intently. He was seriously past it. Stoned on the couch even more before hearing a song I really liked and ran to the dancefloor to find my kaki but they were not there so I went back and stoned till closing time - which was not long, taking a few sips of whatever was left as the time passed.

Closing time arrived at 3.40 instead of 4 and soon we were all headed off. Found that my present from Mich had been stolen. Bastards.

Stupidly asked the bounced to give me a call if he found my shades and the present to which he agreed before walking off. By now I was sober enough to know that I hadn't even given him my number yet. The fucker.

The rest of us headed down and stoned near a deserted road. Kyle who woke up the moment the music stopped had disappeared in spite of himself.

Walked all the way to a not so nearby macdonalds. Khai was spotted by a fucking ugly transvestite who started yelling out to him, calling him chubby and stuff. Wan who was still pretty cranky and ticklish began talking about yanking the lampost out of the ground and using it to hit the tranny.

Queued up at Mac with Wan grumbling all the way about the counter staff being too slow for their own good, and Khai and me laughing our asses off. Mich and her lover for the night had gone to 7eleven, probably to make out. Ken and Decay were already seated at the table.

The usual stuff happened after that except that Ming called Mich to say he was coming to pick her up. That left Ken in a bind because he was the only one staying in the west.

That pretty much concluded my 21st birthday. It was nothing like Jac's birthday, the one where her dad, my uncle, rented a friggin huge bungalow and invited the minister of defence down. Pretty boring by activity's standards, but it was enough for me to have some good friends there.

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I'm one of the last of an era. One of the last few hundred still active NSFs who have been trained in both the M16 as well as the Sar21. I'm one of the last few born in the year 1987, the last year to not have a recurring number in the numerics of the year. (1989 has 2 nines, 1990 has 2 nines, etc)

Saturday Night's the night alright...

Went out to Dbl 0 again with some friends. Didn't drink cuz I was driving. Freakin boring la. But at least they had fun and I know all of them got home safe.... cuz I was driving them home!

Anyways, woke up at like 11 this morning despite sleeping at about 6 cuz I was trying to get my body clock in rhythm for my course. Fuck la, it's like 11pm now. So much for that.

Planning to go clubbing again this saturday. I so intend to let off some steam.

Hopefully my course will be damn slack. I know a number of the people going and a few of the people in the company itself. Haha. Make me suffer equals problems with Audit for you! wahahaha. no la.

I intend to train though. I'm seriously out of shape. My beer belly is starting to grow more. I already have my stash of handrolls ready. 3 packs of Butterfly menthol. lolz.

Really nothing much to say anymore. I'm starting to blank out my mind in preparation for tmr. I guess I'll see you in a week.

Byes.

Men are cruel and the world in unfair.

"Men are cruel and the world is unfair." These words were reinforced repeatedly to my platoon by one 1LT Arthur Poh.

It was a pretty cynical statement but either I've been indoctrinated by the SAF, or I've been let privy to a world beyond the borders of my niche because I now feel this to be true.

Of course for all the good things he thought us, the man was generally an asshole himself but who I am to judge.


There's this guy I know.

Apparently he was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and psychosis. The best part is he claims to have been totally cured of both mental illnesses. I literally wanted to laugh my ass off at that statement because to the best of my knowledge, such a disorder is not curable unless it was brought on later in life. He claims to have been born normal.

Subject displays symptoms of rash anger and easy irritability. According to my amatuer knowledge, bipolar disorder is a "I am now very happy for no reason" and then "I am now very sad/angry for no reason" problem, generally speaking of course. It's not a "I am happy now but since you pissed me off, you'll get it" kind of thing. It just follows cycles.

Subject also claims to have fought to have stayed on for his NS term instead of getting a PES F rating. Bitches and moans about knowing how to do everything and also repeatedly points out how he used to handle his many many events outside. Does not give details.

Subject is always late to camp. He either immediately goes to the bunk to sleep or goes to play soccer. His duties are never done. This includes the single "This is your jobscope that no one else is allowed to touch" duty of compiling the parade state every morning.

He is an unreliable person and a backstabber with no balls to cover his colleagues who have covered for him. Has no respect for anyone but his elder brother and constantly hurls vulgarities, often putting our now-ORD-ded resident Tourettes man to shame.

Subject mentions how since he will be ORDing later than most of us, he will therefore be more lao jiao than us. He lost me on that one.

Claims his brother was an RP and therefore from the stories, he knows how life is like in camp. Lol. This includes how life is like in BMT. A tick for BMT in Ninja, Mohawk, Taurus and Viper. Yes, he knows how BMT is like in all these companies. Lol.

Fyi, subject was sent for BMT in unit and was down PES-ed that same day. He was posted straight here after the fuckers in HQ decided that they need the creme de-la creme. We are a god damn support unit. We are the fuckers you call when you want work to be done. How the fuck do you think we are going to work with morons like this?

On the very first day he came in, he texted everyone, asking if we wanted to hang out. He even passed one of my friends' number to his own friend for friendship building. I... I.... lol.

Subject never replies to SMSes and frequently asks people to cover him. This includes when he is talking to his imaginary girlfriend on the phone, with the loudspeaker on.

In my opinion, these are all symptoms of a fucking attitude problem. Not a mental disorder.

Most of the elder malays sucked up to him cuz they needed to build connections with him for future manipulations. The chinese hated him cuz he's a racist bigot. And everyone in the office hated him because exactly as the saying goes, we actually do better without him.

He's not just a dead weight, he actually swims in the opposite direction.

In my opinion, he is not fit to live. But with foresight, who am I to judge. I am no saint myself. Judge not lest ye be judged. A saying popularised by a famous TV villain no doubt.


So I posthulate.

Children, despite their misgivings and disappointments in their early lives never do truly grasp the concept of "nothing in this world is fair". You really need to experience it to understand it.

And that, in essence is what separates most of the women from most of the men. Women begin their experiences in the real world in an environment with few and lighter consequences.

For most of us men, yes even some of the PES Es, they have experienced the consequences of assholism. They know that making it easier for yourself makes it harder on someone else which makes people hate you which makes people want to kill you which makes people do bad things which makes life harder for even more people.

There are but few things wrong on paper with the SAF. Everything else is just from the people in it.

Lady from Quebec

In the army, we constantly point out and rate chicks. At least that's what me and my colleagues do. Perhaps because we have nothing better to do, perhaps because of the sudden change of visual stimuli or even because of an apparent need to prove one's manliness, but every time I oversee a Graduation Parade or an Enlistment, my colleagues and I trade hand signals and silent nods showing our approval or disapproval of our targets.

This is especially true during Graduation Parades when girlfriends(usually) dress to impress. It's a proud moment for their other halfs to 'pass-out' and many are not shy to mirror that sentiment in their fashion sense. Sometimes even sisters decide to put on a little show for the soldiers she knows are watching her.

Sometimes we even consider fashionable aunties in our assessments. 1 out of every 4 GPs though have poor showings in terms of the statistics of 'hot chicks'.

There was however this one GP 2 days ago where there was this supremely gorgeous chick. With a plunging neckline that still kept her classy and not in the least bit inappropriate and a smile to match, she truly was a vision of an angel. People use that phrase all the time to describe pretty women but in truth, she could have truly been an angel and I would not have been surprised.

In her gray dress (I swear it was light gray but my friends said it was an obvious blue :x) with flowers above the hem, with legs to die for and slightly brown, slightly wavy hair done by God himself, she was a radiant vision of beauty and style.

In my book, she was a perfect 10. She was even familiar with some of the other recruits' girlfriends who were of no similar caliber when they stood next to her. From the way she walked, to the way she interacted with her friends, I stopped caring about stuff like how she might sound like and what attitude she had. I was mesmerised.

She was slow in going to meet her boyfren/brother and that loaned more credibility to the notion that she was someone's sister. Instead of being all over her, the recruit was instead more content to take photos with his buddies and another girl(yes, there was another girl), leaving me even more convinced that she truly was just someone's sister.

She had caught me looking at her a number of times and was not afraid to look back. There was once she even started waving in my general direction and flashing that gorgeous smile but as there were still parents in front, I assumed that she was waving at her friends. Little did I know that she was waving at me.

Alas she was too far away for me to go down and talk to her while still looking casual and my stupid stupid refusal to screw up my military life stopped me from even waving at her.

Instead, I continued to look at her and she would occasionally look back, throwing me for a loop and wishing that from a distance, she would think I was worth it to break all protocol and actually walk up the bleachers to me so I could save my stupid military face. But life is not like the movies.

Too soon, the parents and graduants from BMTC Quebec 02/08 were invited to make their way to the ferry terminal. Throughout her slow and beautiful stroll to the edge of the parade square, she kept looking back and with each step she took, she moved further and further away until she could not be seen.

I was left alone again, wondering what had just happened.

The next day there was an enlistment exercise and although I related my story to my friends with vigour, the traditional practice of pointing out the 'hot chicks' no longer had the same appeal as it once did. Instead, I stared out into the sea of parents and silently wished she had another brother enlisting.

I was day dreaming again of course but sometimes, just sometimes, foolish hope pays.

Sometimes I wish Singapore was smaller.

What the army teaches us

One of the few things that the army brings out in us is lust.

I swear, after hearing your commanders shouting in your ear and forcing you to do really stupid and exhausting things, the (perceived) soft and gentle "company" of a lady feels like the 7th level of heaven.

Recruits, during their Basic Military Training(BMT), routinely bring their magazines featuring bikini clad women and read, in earnest, the air-headed conversations with these ladies written across the pages as if they were really talking to them. It gives them a sense of reprieve from the harsh and controlled masochistic mayhem that is the army. I'm not implying that they "use" the magazine because in the psychological state that they're in, most impressionable recruits follow the much joked about rule against wanking off in the SAF. True to making use of every available resource in resource-scarce Singapore, the SAF is against informal discharges.

This goes on (the lust, not the magazine reading) throughout one's tenure in the army and in some cases, well past it.

I remember during a Chinese New Year event that was held on the same day and near the vicinity of a similar event held for employees of Cycle and Carriage. I had already been posted out as a permstaff guy and was no longer a recruit. Halfway through the insanely boring army event filled with Getais and a fat man promoting their services by handing out their flyers in the form of a game/contest, a few of us began noticing hot women(from the Cycle and Carriage event) walking past the entrance of the event room, presumably to the toilets.

With the true courage of an SAF Warrior, a few of us headed to the corridor to stand by the wall like pimps watching our fodder go by. We were not dissatisfied. The fodder apparently was though.

I have a BMT buddy who constantly SMSed and talked with his girlfriend throughout his BMT days and seemed oblivious to the surrounding pressure and chaos that most of the rest of us went through. I always wondered how he did it (from blatant eavesdropping sessions, I gathered his girlfriend was herself a handful).

I have another friend who routinely visits Geylang for tau huay and then for the other tau huay. I kind of got the feeling that he felt at peace in that fantasy world.

In the army, when you're not talking about current affairs, fucked up commanders or the latest white horse who's enlisting, you're either talking about hot (in some cases "cute") chicks or verbally rating the babes from friendster or facebook profiles according to hotness, cuteness and several other attributes. Quality of tau huay included.

Look Mum! The army has made me into a man!

Fuck it.

note: I don't really know how the 302's are affected by National Service.