Ashcuse me, there ish a problem wit your mic.

The other day I was handling an Anti-Tobacco talk in my auditorium where the Emcee was a pack-a-day smoker. There were many boring speeches by many people who had a lot to say including a "recoveree" who literally gave a 2 second pause after reading each sentence very slowly in his "How I Gave up Smoking Speech". Of course there were 'fun' speeches from a few like the 9Div Commander who was open enough to actually interact with the crowd although if one of the 2ICs had shared his story of why he quit smoking it would have been really nice (it's really very touching but it's his story to tell, so...) .

Anyway, apart from all that, there was a skit by HPB.

There was this young lady who looked alright but who wore a figure-hugging dress that was really flattering, and misleading. So when we set her up with the wireless clip-on mic, almost all of us were wondering where on earth she kept the transmitter. I don't need to tell you where our first guess was.

About halfway through the skit, she forgot to unmute her mic and she was left to shout out her lines. Being the gentlemen I was, I rushed backstage with a wireless handheld mic before stopping at the curtain.

The lead actor was very observant and saw me standing by the side and cued me out with a "Yes? Can I help you?". So I walked out and knocked on the invisible door and handed the mic to the young lady. There was silence for a bit before the lead actor thanked me with great exaggeration and I gave him a down-swinging 2 finger salute. Then the crowd went wild, cheering loudly.

My hands were shaking a little when I reached the curtain not because I was enjoying the glory, but because that 2 finger salute was actually a really good save from my performing a real SAF salute. When thanking or acknowledging my friends, we generally salute each other and I realised how close I was to almost giving that civilian the same thing. Luckily, muscle memory from previous habits managed to convert that salute to a casual one.

For Pete's sake, the COMMANDER of the 9th Division was there!

Anyway, I promptly headed back up to the control room after the scene was over but by the next scene, she had turned off the microphone again. wtf.

Talk about a 'doh' moment. Luckily, that was her last scene.